Another update for any that are interested. I'll start off by saying I now hate Anderson connectors. They're a neat idea and I'm sure they work well but having 20 variations that do the same thing is ridiculous. I managed to find some more brown connectors at work and I was almost mad that I had wasted 20 quid on some when I could get some for free, turns out there are actually two shades of brown with different keyings. Also the splitter cable that I bought with SB50 connectors, turns out they use shorter contacts than the SBS50 connectors so I've also had to buy the longer contacts and a crimping tool. So I've ended up needlessly spending around £110, if I could have just found a SBS50-BRN splitter cable.
However, I've been doing some more testing and we have success. First thing I needed to figure out was what is actually required to get the second charging running, and it turns out the CAN control is optional. Hook up the charger attached, enable, and ground pins and plug the charger into the mains and it starts putting out power. That's really good news because not only does it make splitting the signal between the two chargers easy with 3 extra wires instead of 7/8 it also means there's no chance of any mixed signals.
The next thing to do was see if all of this actually worked in practice. I haven't made up the final splitter cable yet but I cobbled one together with some contacts I already had on some wires and some Wagos. I didn't leave it running for very long as they were only rated for about 10A, but as shown in the app it charged at a peak of about 2990W (it was jumping around a bit so hard to screenshot) and when I cut power to one of the chargers it dropped to an expected 1450w.
So, the next steps are to assemble this beefier splitter cable, get some longer bolts and spacers to be able to mount the second charger below the stock one, and then decide on how I'm going to go about adding in the second control connector.