What: Dynaplug Micro Pro Inflator DMPI-1502
Cost: $54 USD
Summary: A small zippered tool bag which also happens to contain an eardrum-and-leisure-time destroying 12VDC operated tire inflator.
Sure, it's small. It's useful. No, it does not fit in the lower chassis frame tube of a 2016 Zero DSR.
The tire inflator kit includes a variety of SAE trailer 2-pong plug adapters for ring terminals, spring clamps, other SAE trailer 2-prong plugs, and even a rather clever combination auxiliary 12vdc plug which quickly transforms into what I imagine to be some kind of BMW motorbike-specific power plug of sorts.
All of those included wiring adapters together weigh about as much as the inflation pump itself, however from this you can count at least a couple of 15-amp automotive fuses and the peace of mind that if you really had to fashion a new pants belt, there's plenty of plastic and (copper? aluminum? let's go optimistic here...) copper wiring to get the job done. If you care to get fancy, perhaps those super-adorable looking battery terminal spring clamps give hope to a chance of making some trend-setting suspenders too.
Starting with the 12VDC auxiliary power adapter on the Zero Motorcycles 2016 DSR's OEM auxiliary 12VDC power port, you really have to punch the son of a bitch into the socket. This is not a confidence inspiring connection, no, it is more like the sort of thing I might try to ignite some tinder in a desert survival situation by sparking the center pin against the mating bit inside the accessory plug. I guess if you haven't planned ahead for this sort of thing, which is kind of the pump's intended use scenario, this will do.
I mess about for a few minutes in the dark, admire myself in that I really hate doing motorcycle maintenance in the outside winter night, and conclude there are other targets to aim for.
Moving on to my internal combustion vehicle's tires, as these have sat unused for long periods of time while I ride the Zero (SHAMELESS EV PROMOTION HERE). I'm completely unimpressed by the plastic anal probe included with the ... I mean the bar/psi gauge included with the pump kit. It's fucking useless. Put it in your butt, maybe wash it first or something (you know, wash the thing you're putting in your butt, and maybe if you want to also wash your butt). Throw it away if you must, but seriously don't rely on it for anything other than reading slightly more-than but ambiguously less-than 40psi, or 20psi, depending on which way gravity and the prevailing winds happen to catch it.
Having chucked the provided gauge into a dark flexible space (RECYCLING BAG... geeze) I've turned to my trusty who-the-fuck-knows-where-it-came-from re-branded digital "Accutire" gauge. Lo and behold I've found a tire reading at a remarkably defiant 19psi. Wow. 19! Good job tire, let's give you some gentle encouragement.
At this point I'm very glad that ... hold on I seem to have a bit of tinnitus which we'll talk on in just a moment. I am very glad that the pump unit has a well-placed and always-on white LED light source to indicate that it is plugged into a power source, and also just possibly to flood the smallest of areas with non-descript kind of white but also slightly blue illumination. It's just good enough to light the way and find the valve stem at which point you can pretty much just go by feel. A brighter or better light would not serve any better purpose.
There's a rubberized plastic capped switch atop the pump unit which -surprise!- works great and is handy if you just want to... hang on... let's do it. Let's talk about hearing protection.
At 10 ft away the pump is about as loud as a 125cc scooter cruising down the block if say your ear parts were a consistent 3 ft to the exhaust bits.
Wear. Ear. Plugs.
Back to the tire on that not-so-daily driver car of mine which should be at 40psi, I've got it hooked up to the air line and the pump is WaAaAaaAahaaAAahbbbbrrappapapapappppp-ing away, and progress is slow but surely steady. I think you could leave it going 5 minutes at a time and come back to check on it, and not much chances it would do better than 10psi gained for a 5 minute period on sedan car tires. After a fair while the tire is back to 40 PSI, I disconnect, and check again it's still at 40PSI. All good.
What else would you want from this pump kit? It's pretty functional for holding up your pants, includes a sex toy, and just enough inflation pressure to get you back on the road after your hearing is totally destroyed.
Kind of reminds me of my mid-twenties party going days...